It's Not Too Soon to Start Panicking about the Next Storm!

The Washington Post reports on people spending fistfuls of money to stave off snow-related disaster.  How can you spend your money with winter still a month and a half away?

• "Installing heat tape in a W or Y pattern along the roof at the gutter's edge and into downspouts costs between $500 and $1,000..."
• "Ice and water shield installation costs about $500 to $750 for an entire roof." 
• "To stop the escape of heat, homeowners may want to install new fiberglass insulation ($500 to $1,000) in the attic or blow-in foam insulation, which is more permeating ($2,000 to $5,000), Burgess said."
• "You can pay as little as $250 for a small electric plug-in snowblower, $400 to $500 for a decent gasoline-powered blower that can easily clear most sidewalks and smaller residential driveways, and up to $1,500 for a ride-on machine than can blow the snow some 50 feet."
• "Lower-priced gasoline-powered rollaway units that can be stored in a garage or shed until needed cost between $600 and $2,500." 
• "[A] whole-house stand-alone generator...can be installed in a permanent location for a total price of $7,000 to $8,000."

This is DC: We Need to Know Where to Place Blame

In regard to the snowstorms that affected the D.C. metro region and other mid-Atlantic and northeast coastal regions, a new study by a team of scientists at Columbia University's Lamont-Doherty Earth Observatory argues that global warming was not involved.

Instead, the Washington Post reports,

the anomalous winter was primarily the result of convergence of an exceptionally strong El Nino and unusually strong negative phase of North Atlantic Oscillation (NAO).

Just so we're clear.

Mind the Snow Emergency Route

Just heard on Channel 4 News: According to Police Chief Cathy Lanier, DC Police handed out 4,000 parking tickets during the blizzard to cars parked along emergency routes. At $250 a pop, that's ... $1 MILLION.

Perhaps that will replace some of that pitiful $6.2 million they had set aside for plowing.

DC also quickly ticketed cars legally parked but whose owners could not wade through the masses of plowed snow to reach the meters.

I'd be worried more about my eyesight than the snow...

The Washington Post reports:

A resident reported that a white dog appeared to be stuck in heavy snow in a yard; it had not moved in some time, and the caller feared for the animal's safety. An officer entered the yard and discovered that the "dog" was a metalized nylon balloon with the face of a white dog on it.

Snowpanic.com Hits Wikipedia

So someone decided to create a "Snurricane" article on Wikipedia.  Since Wikipedia these days is all about the citations, at 12:46 yesterday, someone (sloppily) pasted a reference to this site into the article.  At 12:52 the link was removed, but for 6 shining moments, we were there.

The whole article will probably be deleted (most activity now seems to be arguing about which precise justification applies), so enjoy it while you can.

Uh oh

I just spotted someone walking out of Lowe's with a new shovel, and
now I see someone inside with one.

Snow Hurricane? Snurricane?

People are calling the storm we're about to get a "snow hurricane".  Apparently people are wrong, but that's no reason not to panic.

Snow Panic a Growth Industry?

National Geographic indicates that winters like this past one (with two 2'+ snowfalls) -- 1-in-300-year events in the old days -- may become the norm.  Global warming, which you might think would prevent snowstorms, may actually cause them.  Not necessarily for the reason previously speculated here -- shutdown of the Gulf Stream -- but because warmer temperatures cause more moisture to be evaporated from oceans.

School Buses in Laurel Get Stuck

If my memory of high school is accurate, this is probably the most awesome thing that happened to the kids all year:

She said the Eleanor Roosevelt bus became stuck when it tried to make a U-turn on a snowy street that is part of its normal route. Its 16 student passengers had to get off the bus while a tow truck pulled it out.

Fan Mail

A reader writes:

Your website is very, very funny! I live in northeastern Ohio, and we probably have a couple of feet of snow on the ground now, and I swear, people are in such a panic. Like it never snows in northeastern Ohio in February! So I've been enjoying you website a great deal as I taunt my Facebook friends, who are all in a tizzy over snow. Snow! Have a great day and stay warm!

Thanks! This is a good opportunity to remind people that they can become our fan on Facebook.

How Not to Get Ice off Your Roof

• Don't use a propane torch.
• Don't use a propane torch if you have antique Porsches in your garage.
• "[H]ire a professional -- one who doesn't employ propane torches."

Someone in Rockville violated all those rules.

Hide the Women and Children

Reader DB sends in news of this Snow Dalek, sure to strike panic into the hearts of nerds everywhere.  Panic of a different sort  is in the air here in Wilmington, NC, where our nephew told us about his neighbor's anatomically correct Lady Gaga snowman.  (Sorry, no pictures.) 

Great Moments in Senate Speechifying

"I am convinced that infants born in Washington, D.C., are taken from the arms of their loving mothers right when they are born into a room where someone shows a film of a snowstorm with shrieking and screaming so that those children come to believe snow is a mortal enemy, like a nuclear attack, because I have seen, for over 40 years here, people in this town go into a full-scale panic at the thought of a snowfall."

-Sen. Dick Durbin, D-IL

No, really, people like to buy bread before snowstorms...

 

Almost a week after the snow started (not counting the minor snowfall we had in the middle of last week), the bread supply at our local Giant is still depleted. Almost everything else is in good supply, but heaven help you if you want bread. (Fortunately, I bought two loaves last week, so we have more than we need.)

Not the best way to get your street plowed...

County drivers working to plow the roads in Prince George's County were accosted Thursday around 10 a.m. by several residents, who told them that if their streets didn't get plowed they were going to "throw them out of their trucks and beat them up," said Susan Hubbard, spokeswoman for the county's Department of Public Works and Transportation.

Full report, including a clarification that doesn't really clear things up, in the Washington Post.

Snowholes Park Where They Like

A reader from Germantown, MD tells us that one of her neighbors panicked in their condo parking lot. What else could explain parking in the middle of the lot? S/he blocked in two available spots, and made it very difficult for parked cars on both sides of the street to get out. Snow plows, of course, cannot squeeze by.

Morning Snowflakes

As I gird myself to head out and shovel (again), please enjoy these tales of snow panic.

• Two James Madison University student have been charged with felony assault for throwing snowballs ("missiles") at a snow plow and undercover police. (Thanks to Snowpanic.com reader JG for the tip.)
  
• A falling chunk of ice dislodged a gas line, causing a leak at a NW Washington school.
  
• A Hyattsville woman joked on Tuesday, "Now would be a really bad time to go into labor." Wednesday, at the height of the blizzard, she did.
  

Additional Accumulation

 

We're measuring 9" on the previously-shoveled sidewalk at Snowpanic.com. Probably more on top of the existing snow, but we have no good way of measuring that.

So tomorrow is for shoveling. We still have power, satellite TV and Internet access, so we're grateful.

They'll pry her snowball from her cold, cold hand...

Snow ball fights in dc are hard core on 12seconds.tv

There's a new report of an interaction between snowballs and police officers in DC. Either police tried to break up a snowball fight, got hit by a snowball, and arrested the woman who threw it, or police tried to break up a snowball fight, may or may not have gotten hit by a snowball, and arrested the woman who didn't throw it. Depends on whom you believe. Unless there's more conclusive video footage, this one doesn't have the legs of the December story.

A Snowmaggedon Mystery

The Washington post reports that the Tenleytown Safeway was left open by employees fleeing today's storm. In response, weary residents walked in, took groceries, and left money on the empty checkout counters.

A heartwarming tale of people doing the right thing in the midst of absolute chaos. But it gets weirder...

Safeway spokesman Craig M. Muckle said a member of Safeway's security staff got to the store shortly after 2 p.m. Muckle said he was told by the security staff member that all four doors were locked and nothing appeared out of the ordinary.

"Nothing was actually taken," Muckle said. "And there was no money left on the counter."

Oh, so it was an urban legend? Not really...

The paragraph immediately preceding the above denial reads:

A Post reporter was able to enter the Tenleytown store and saw the money, confirming accounts by witnesses and the police. In fact, police said they were having trouble finding anyone from the supermarket chain to secure the building about 1 p.m.

So who are you going to believe? Safeway spokesman Craig M. Muckle? Or the police and Washington Post? I don't know; it makes me suspicious of Safeway's other denials.